


He Doesn't Like Endings

by glockenspielium



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Post Episode: s07e05 The Angels Take Manhattan, Time Travel, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-15
Updated: 2013-01-15
Packaged: 2017-11-25 13:44:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/639480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glockenspielium/pseuds/glockenspielium
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Never let him see the damage and never, never let him see you age.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Doesn't Like Endings

**Author's Note:**

  * For [extryn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/extryn/gifts).



> Because that scene at the end of Angels in Manhattan was far too beautiful and feels :3

He’s in no fit state to drive anything and they both know it.  

So she takes charge, like she always does when he really needs him. Usually he’d never admit it, she ponders as she half carries him through the TARDIS door, his arm a dead weight over her shoulders, but she’s hardly surprised that, this time, he doesn’t protest.  

It’s only once they are well cleared from the twenty-first century and River is navigating around a particularly vicious nebula that he first stirs, blinking, suddenly aware of the half-dried tears on his cheeks, his past-wife-to-be apparently consumed with navigation of the TARDIS (glancing over at him when she thinks he won’t see her worry) and the profound silence and emptiness of the console room. 

All of the most familiar phrases, resting on his tongue, pressing to be said, just one last time, knowing their time has moved on. He opens his mouth to speak- then quickly shuts it again, not trusting himself. 

His crumpled form on the stairs is so horribly broken that she can’t bring herself to even say anything. He wouldn’t want to talk right now. And so she lets him sit, lets him mourn. She cannot afford herself such luxurious, her time to cry will come later. Right now, she needs to get them to safety, needs to get him away, save him. Again.  

_Never let him see the damage_  

“River they were your parents. I’m sorry, I didn’t even think..”  

His voice is hoarse and slow, as if the words are only occurring to him as they leave his lips. His eyes are too old. She stops him before he finds the words to make her care. 

“It doesn’t matter” 

“Of course it matters” 

The silence is awkward and easier. She sighs and turns to face him. 

‘What matters is this. Doctor- don’t travel alone” 

A sad smile. 

“Travel with me then.” 

Oh, how she had yearned for years to hear those words. A lifetime ago. 

“Whenever and wherever you want… but not all the time” 

_And never, ever let him see you age._  

One time he asked her why it is she changes her hair so often. 

She replied easily- unlike him, she only has one life, but she can have infinite hairstyles, so why wait! 

He laughed. She lied.  

The more she changed everything, the less he would notice the things that change. Change one thing and there has to be a reason. Change everything always and everything goes unnoticed. So when her the wrinkles around her eyes grow more prominent, she wears her hair long, out, curling around her eyebrows; distracting. 

He jokes that she’ll need to see to drive. She prays that she notices her vision going early enough to organise undetectable contact lenses. 

So she can’t stay with him always. She’s not like everyone else, all those who’ve come before and after her, who have that luxury. 

She has to look after him, first.  

“One psychopath per TARDIS- don’t you think?” 

He needs her, he will for some time now, for long before she even realises just how much. But not all the time. 

She’s not like everyone else. She needs to be there always. She needs to remember to always leave and never end.

_He doesn’t like endings._


End file.
